List of specials is often seen in the background of the comic.
The Coffee of Doom Specials on the blackboard are most often jokes by the Coffee of Doom staff, typically involving black humor (e.g., "We stab you so you can call in sick").
User beaniesue on the LiveJournal QC group compiled a list of CoD specials through comic 1432 and updated it to show Coffee of Doom specials through mid-2010.
1–999[]
- Rockin Latte
- Black Metal Mocha
- Emospresso
- Electroclash Frappe
- “Tip us or we will kill again”
- Latte w/ Bourbon-flavored syrup
- Fried Egg Mocha
- Shot of espresso and a punch in the mouth
- “We are surly because you suck”
- Flavors of teh day
- Sextuple espresso
- Latte of DOOM
- Vodkoffee!
Number 167: Fuck You, Bladder!
- Today’s Specials
- “Yum” Triple Chocolate Mocha
- “Eww!” – Triple Pork Mocha
- “Fuck you, bladder” – 60 oz. coffee
- “Starbucks is for assholes”
- Triple Chocolate mocha
- Triple mocha chocolate
- Spam, spam, spam, mocha, and spam
- We stab you so you can call in sick
- “Please do not poke the baristas”
Number 279: This Is What I Keep Talking About
- Today is Free Beating Day
- for more info, please annoy the nearest employee
Number 325: My Kind Of Smoothie
- Red Bull and Peanut Butter
- Espresso in espresso
- No-Doz 20oz
Number 360: Consult Your English Textbooks
- Triple espresso brownie
- Triple brownie espresso
- We Prank-Call your Boss
- TEA OF DOOM (x eyes dead smilie face)
- A sharp blow to the back of the head
- Tea (tea is for wimps)
- Pseudomocha
- Wedgies!
- Regular ol’ coffee (with snakes)
- Regular ol’ tea (with more snakes)
- Snakes (with spiders)
- We’re remodeling
- Make up your own damn specials
Number 467: Listed As Threatened
- Chaitea
- Chaicoffee
- Gincoffee
- Noogies!
Number 537: Just Think About It, Really
- Double Chocolate Mocha
- We hit you with the broom
- We hit your stupid friend with the broom
- Mass-brooming!
- Quadruple Espresso Monstrosity
- Carnivorous Plant Latte
- <DICK>< Cookies!
Number 615: That's Some Good Webcest
- Coffee with a scone in it
- Scone with a cookie in it
- Your ass with a hamster in it
Number 651: Doin' The Force Choke
- Waiting in line
- Crankiness
- Beatings
Number 692: You Learn Weird Things When You're Raised Catholic
- Spicy Mocha
- Spicy Latte
- Turkey Bomb
Number 725: For Some Reason A Witty Title Eludes Me
- Nothin’ yet!
- Spraypaint latte
- Jerky mocha
- Free punch from our new employee!
Number 751: Poison Dart Insults
- 2 for 1 espresso
- Free SPAM? w/ purchase
- Lemons
Number 790: Probably Based On A True Story
- Think about dogs
- Think about dongs
- Think about dugouts
Number 810: And Now You Will Too
- Mocha w/a battery in it
- Pile of screws
- Lasers!
Number 853: Does That Count As A Free Drink?
- Cat hair latte
- Espresso w/ pipe tabacco
- Bucket o’ fish
- A single coffee bean, lovingly pounded into your forehead
Number 880: QC Fanfic Squadron ENGAGE
- “Team Samosa” – Virgin Mimosa
- F.I.S.T. full of coffee
- Dill Mocha
- Hemp latte
- Dennis Kucinich
Number 898: Angus Looks Ridiculous In That Shirt
- Oreo Latte
- Caramel Mocha
- Wikipedia Vandalism Espresso
Number 902: The Theories Were Wrong
- Chocolate Americano
- We Pinch you and Put It on Youtube
Number 906: They'll Be Doing This For Twenty Minutes Straight
- The Specials are Cancelled
- Until we get some fucking tips, people!
- Metallica Mocha
- Megadeth Milkshake
- Mastodon Muffins
Number 970: That's What Friends Are For
- You give us money, we give you coffee
- Lolcat latte
- WE FIRE A HARPOON
- INTO YOUR FACE
- Chupacabralatte
- Bigfoot 22-oz espresso
- Yeti cannolli
1000s[]
Number 1001: I Can Has CatPuter?
- Hang on hang on dang it
Number 1013: Who'd Be John Connor?
- Portal Muffin Cube
- Half-Latte: Episode I
- Team Fortress Frappe
Number 1031: They're, Like, Pretty Big
- Muffin Shaped Like Laura Bush
- Muffin Shaped Like Rachel Ray
- Muffin Shaped Like a Dog Fighting a Crow
Number 1037: Based On A True Story
- Hurrrrrrr
Number 1055: Something About Them Appeals
- Bacon Muffin
- Bacon Espresso
- Bacon Latte (vegan)
- Space muffin
- A tic tac toe puzzle
- OXO
- XXO
- XOX
- Pour a 40 for Gygax
- Cup o’ Peas
- Cup o’ bees
- Cup o’ pee
- NO GUM ALLOWED IN CoD ANYMORE
- Mocha w/ a hair in it
- Latte w/ apple core
- Scone of Bone
Number 1179: There's One For Every Occasion
- Raccoon Scone
- Pidgeon Macchiatto
- Fleas
Number 1205: Shouldn't Have Brought That One Along
- Cat-hair latte
- Litterbox Brownie
- Daft Punk @ 200 dB
- Honey latte
- Nutty Mocha
- Cup o’ Bees
- EROTIC TOAST
Number 1258: For Great Justice
- 🧀
- Faux-coroa
- Pseudo-latte
- Metacrino
Number 1276: Oh Dear Jesus No–Number 1284: Suffer For Your Art
- Were pretty good, for a ska band
Number 1288: Another Penny-Rant
- We murder your pet and burn your house down
- $3.95
Number 1307: Questionable Progress
- .coffee {class:organic;
- variety:ethiopian;
- flavor: #hazelnut;}
Number 1311: A Trustworthy Bunch
- Abominable latte
- Yellow snow chai
- Hypothermia
Number 1323: And It Just Got Worse
- Fuck
- You
Number 1357: Later Captured By Interpol
- Peppermint latte
- Aniseed mocha
- Ferret muffins
- Fresh!
Number 1360: She's Be Fine In An Hour Or So
- ½ price bagels
- 2x price muffins
- Bacon latte
- Concrete latte
- Steel ?
- Unionization
- Brownies
- POOP
- LOL
Number 1432: Or Born To Be Wild
- Habanero scones
- Chorizo latte
Number 1446: Aw Come On, Plenty Of Stuff Can Do That
- Robo Latte
- Machinesspresso
- Crush
Number 1479: Pillaging Was Their Version Of Twitter
- Whale-flavored latte
- ambergris tea
- BLOOD + THUNDER
Number 1507: Lest It Be Overrun By Jungle
- chococaramocha
- megalatte
- farts
Number 1529: The Webcartoonist Lifestyle
- Moose Latte
- Moose Mocha
- Trampling
Number 1538: Euphemising Euphemisms
- Murlock Mocha
- Cthulhu Chai
- Eldritch Muffins
Number 1558: They're In The Dumpster
- Free Children
- (ask around back)
Number 1581: I Groaned So Hard
- Sex Pony Mocha — a reference to a nickname Faye gave to Dora.[1]
- Humpy Sound Latte
- Butts LOL. See also: Butts disease.
- Cinammon latte
- blueberry scone
- no small talk, please
Number 1615: Last Party She Was Invited To
- Death Metal Latte
Number 1637: If You Can't Laugh At Yourself–Number 1641: Foulest Betrayal
- yerba mate latte
- flamed orange peel mocha
- BLOOD TREE MOCHA
Number 1665: New England Style, Of Course
- Nothing yet, hold yer fuckin' horses
- FRESH
- FUCKIN'
- BAGELS
Number 1704: Barista Futures Market
- Banana Mocha
- Banana Brownies
- Banana Bread
- We got way too many bananas
Number 1707: Frenemy Employment
- Yak butter in everything!
- ? new employee: $1
- Spank new employee: $20,000
Number 1780: They've Had AI Since 1996
- NOTHING TODAY,
- JERKS
Number 1805: Executioner's Blues
- none today.
- fuck off.
Number 1856: The Inner Universe
- ? sausage latte
- granola mocha
- crunchy chai
Number 1880: Marigold Is Pretty Harsh
- cayenne mocha
- tequila latte (w/worm)
- cactus up the butt
- ?
- ?
- ? pie?
2000s[]
- bone marrow scones
- bone marrow latte
- BONE MARROW
Number 2209: Which One Is Dilbert
- BLOOD LATTE
- SCAB MOCHA
- BONE AMERICANO
- HOT DOG MUFFIN
Number 2239: Next: Bathroom Privileges
- Bone Meal
- Marrow Mocha
- Rawhide ?
- Butts LOL
- I bet you wanna get all up in TAI’S business
Number 2274: Guest Strip- Maritza Campos (guest strip)
- FREE enema
Number 2280: Plato's Coffeeshop
- ∧ ∧
- o o
- ⏖
- ASK ME HOW TO DRAW A KITTY!
Number 2316: Guest Strip: Ponyleaks (guest comic)
- SPATHE HAM
- FISH HEADS
- UNSHELLED WALNUT MUFFINS
- A KICK IN THE SHIN
- Ghost Pepper Mocha
- Buffalo Scones
- Really shitty granola
Number 2424: The New Hermitage
- Deconstructed Latte
- Postmodern Mocha
- “Honey” “Buns”
- go back to bed
Number 2546: Estimated Wait: 45 Minutes
- Say hello to our new employee, Dale! :-)
Number 2574: I Guess He Walked There Himself
- Punch the new guy: $1
- ? $50
Number 2585: Employee Contacts
- you are very special
- Have a drink prepared by unpaid child labor
- Kale ?
- Kale Mocha
- Kale ?
Number 2987: QC Guest Week 2015: Veronica (guest comic)
- Pumpkin spice pumpkin
- K-cup Mocha Latte
3000s[]
- Sausage Latte
- Beef scone
- blood muffin
- Blood Latte *fair trade, organic blood*
- Chorizo Scone *also has blood in it*
- iced blood
Number 3556: QC Guest Week 2017: Danielle Corsetto
- Special tea du jour:
- Hot Assam
- ass us for a sample!
- Buttercream cappuccino
- derriére you to try it!
Trivia[]
- Dora and Faye discuss specials in Number 1214: Tempting Business Plan.
References
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